“You will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you. True power is sitting back and observing things with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you, that means everyone else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass.” Warren Buffett
When I did my original coaching training, we were taught that one of the problems that people face is the meaning they give to what is being said and done. If my background or conditioning has lead me to believe certain things about myself or life around me, it may set off incorrect assumptions. I then suffer because I believe the words that other person has just uttered mean something that wasn’t intended. We could ask questions to get clarification, but a lot of us feel uncomfortable having that sort of conversation. We would rather have a different sort of conversation in our heads.
What if, next time someone said something that made you feel put down or stressed, you plucked up the courage to ask for clarification? We were also taught that nobody ‘made’ me or you for that matter, feel something. We choose to feel that and we can choose to feel something else instead. If we find it too hard to ask what we see is a difficult question, then as Warren Buffett says, we need to sit back and observe what has just happened with logic. Think about whether this is going to be important in 1, 5, or 10 years time. If not, breathe into the area of discomfort in your body and allow that feeling to dissipate, allow it to pass and move on.
Enjoy restraining yourself from getting too caught up in your emotional reactions.