I have a story today that has been sitting in my ‘saved story’ folder. It isn’t mine, but I loved it when I read it so I thought you might too. It can be too easy to fall prey to the things that have happened to us that we don’t like or wish hadn’t happened. I have talked a lot about choice over the years and we can all exercise that right on a daily basis. What side of the fence we get off on will determine the outcome of how we feel about that event that could make us happy or sad. What is the lesson we want to learn from our experiences?

I hired a plumber to help me restore an old farmhouse. He had just finished a rough first day on the job: a flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric drill quit and his ancient one ton truck refused to start.
While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands.
When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation.. His face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.
Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.
‘Oh, that’s my trouble tree,’ he replied ‘I know I can’t help having troubles on the job, but one thing’s for sure, those troubles don’t belong in the house with my wife and the children.. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home and ask God to take care of them. Then in the morning I pick them up again.’ ‘Funny thing is,’ he smiled,’ when I come out in the morning to pick ’em up, there aren’t nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before.’

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance. We all need a Tree!

Enjoy developing your version of the Trouble Tree!

“Each of us is given a measure of time that gives even as it takes. When we embrace time & think of it as a friend, we realise the golden moments it offers just for the taking.”

I found this message on a birthday card. I’m sure we all know someone who has been ‘taken’ far too early in life and when we reflect on that we realise the absolute privilege we have to live our lives to the best of our ability today. We all have the same number of minutes in a day and if we want to make the most of each of those precious minutes, our intentions are going to matter. It’s not that we have to live every minute doing, but is that doing or being, relate to your purpose in life. That might sound a bit heavy but the beginning of the year is a good time to reflect on what we want to do with those golden moments – and that doesn’t mean the old aged golden moments.

Yesterday I was on yet another call where we went through an exercise to work out what our purpose is and think about whether we feel that what we are doing with our lives is in alignment with that purpose. The work I am doing with personalised health definitely feels in alignment and I’m able to integrate that in my Life coaching for those who make that choice. Having been involved in the physiotherapy side of health, I really appreciate the science behind the precision health system that I’m working with. This is not a multi-level-marketing deal or something where you have to spend money on supplements every month. The research is showing for those with high blood pressure that they are seeing a drop, diabetes markers are coming down into a normal range and anxiety and depression are easing. My insurance company is now recognising one platform that measures our performance and will lower premiums if you meet certain guidelines. This is long overdue and I for one appreciate the opportunity to make the most of the rest of my time on earth by getting involved with this new approach to health.

Enjoy what health you have!

“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” Nelson Mandela

You’re all probably tired of hearing about New Year’s Resolutions. As we move into 2021 we could be looking at our own personal futures, wondering if we ever will achieve what we have set out to do. In the 1980s there were virtually no books on the personal development shelves. Now we are inundated with choice. As the Quantum Physics research grows so does our understanding of not only how we can influence our own lives but also how we can influence the world’s humanity with our thoughts and beliefs.

I am engaged in a short one month course at the moment and there was a quote from a blogger saying, ‘Realism is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of pessimism.’ It could be easy with the world in turmoil to believe that you had any influence on your own life let alone anything else beyond that, but research is showing us that we can affect more than we realise purely by changing from a pessimist to an optimist. Dr Joe Dispenza is continually upgrading his information with his speaking and writing, and there is no doubt, in his mind, how we can all change our reality with our thoughts.

If you’re not already a believer, I invite you to look at the work of Joe Dispenza and others who spend their working life keeping up with the research and bringing it to our attention. The more we can all stay positive and optimistic about the future of the planet called Earth, the more likely there is to be a positive, optimistic future for us all. Although this may sound simple, it does mean that we are all going to have to give up the negative pessimistic thoughts we have about where the world is headed. Every thought we all have that has been changed from one of hopelessness to one of  hopefulness, can change the energy of the world. That may seem impossible at the moment. Give it a try and see how it will make a difference to your own life and that may open the door to the idea of possibility on a larger scale.

Enjoy being positive and optimistic as much as you can!

As the year comes to a close, it is a time for reflection – a time to release old thoughts and beliefs and forgive old hurts. Whatever has happened in the past year, the New Year brings fresh beginnings. Exciting new experiences and relationships await. Let us be thankful for the blessings of the past and the promise of the future.  Peggy Toney Horton

Well, how did you all survive Xmas day with all the family stresses that pop up at times like that? We all hope it is going to be different this time around. Maybe we’ve done some work on ourselves and we were keen to see how we would stand up to the different energies that come together at these times. But it was harder than we had imagined. Every day is a new day, a time to look forward and not back. To recognise that we did the best we could under the circumstances on the day and don’t judge where we feel we may have not done as well as we thought we should. That doesn’t solve anything. It closes down our hearts when we are criticised or judged including from ourselves. We need our hearts to be beating evenly or in what is called coherence.  This is the best aim for our emotional stability.

The New Year is a great time to make a new resolve to honour what we are trying to do and persist with the decisions that we want to happen. Rather than hoping or having a half-hearted attempt at a plan, we need to have the resolve of an intention, a belief that this time we will get the job done, not with the judgement for the lack of forward movement in 2020, not with a memory of all the negatives, instead with a memory of the positive energy that comes with recognising the achievements no matter how small and building on them. I wish you all a bright 2021 with a lot of self-encouragement as you face exciting new experiences and improved relationships.

Enjoy your fresh beginnings!

“Christmas doesn’t come from a store, maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more…”  Dr. Seuss

After the circumstances of 2020 I think we can all agree with this sentiment. It has been a year of supporting others and trying to nurture ourselves. Stress was already a huge part of many lives, but this has escalated as people or loved ones become ill, as people lose their jobs or have their businesses verge on collapse, or we simply can’t connect with friends and family as we need to. This year, more than ever, is a time to not only over indulge with what we put in our mouths, but also a time to reflect on what we have been through over the last 9 months or so. As usual there will be a certain percentage of us who continue to go through things we would rather not have to deal with, but that is life, and continuing to reflect on who we are becoming through these challenges, is a big part of our evolution as a human being on Earth at this time.

Hopefully you are all able to share this time of connection with someone. We can focus on those who are unable to be with us because they live in another country or we can choose to focus on how much we can enjoy the time with those who are with us. Weather here in Dunedin has not been what most would call summer and rather than dream about a white Xmas we tend to want the weather to be fine so we can sit around the Barbie, but we can’t do anything about the weather either. This year most of my Xmas cards and letters may not get there before Santa comes down the chimney, but I hope the recipients can enjoy them when they do arrive, rather than judge me for being a normal human being who is running late.

I wish all of you reading this, a wonderful time of connection with another human being over this period, because as Dr Seuss says, that’s what Xmas is about, to most of us.

“Strength doesn’t come from what you CAN do. It comes from OVERCOMING the things you once thought YOU COULDN’T”   Karen Winter

I spent a lot of my life sailing along coping with what I considered to be the normal things of life. I guess I developed a certain level of strength from achieving results in my schooling and at university. I worked at things probably more than some of my talented friends did but looking back now I’m pleased that the work I put in then afforded me the ability to be accepted into physiotherapy, a profession I have mostly loved. Loved because working with people is fundamental to who I am & also because I have recently found out that my HealthType is made up of people who like to be active a lot of the time & you are certainly active all day every day in the physio world – as long as you are doing clinical work & not sitting at a computer as a researcher.

But I really didn’t see any of that as an amazing achievement. It was all within my capabilities I guess, so it wasn’t a big deal. The biggest deal was that I only just got into the training because there was a limit to your height. One of the things I get a sense of achievement with these days is mastering something on this computer, which originally felt impossible. Each one of those steps gives me the confidence and strength to take another step. Even though maths was a strong subject at school, my brain doesn’t like following the technical rules, but then I guess I just don’t like following rules full stop. So here I am stuck at one of these ‘machines’ a lot these days, getting frustrated when some small point thwarts me, but a strong sense of achievement and confidence when I master something, especially if only Dr Google has helped me.

Enjoy finding strength and a sense of achievement by giving things a go!

“Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it’s letting go.”

The Chinese believe that the Lung energy is about taking on the new but then being able to let go when the time is right, which of course is what we do with the breath. We might think only the in-breath is important as we bring in life-giving oxygen. But like a balloon there is only so much we can take in before we have to let go of the old stale breath and make room for more of the new. The waves of the sea also come and go. Grief is the emotion associated with the Lung energy, not just the grief we feel when someone dear leaves us, but also for other losses such as a job, loss of our health when we are no longer able to do all we could in the past, our youth when everything seems to wear out, or of course the big one at the moment for a lot of people around the world is the pandemic – the grief we feel about the changes we have had to make. If our Lung energy is balanced then we are able to let go appropriately.

However we often feel it is stronger to hold on well past the ‘use by date’ of the relationship, the job or our health. This can be very tiring as we work hard to maintain the status quo. The letting go may be more of an acceptance that things have changed, as things do; a recognition that we actually do have the strength to move forward into the new life. At the moment I have been on a detox with a large group of people. Some are really struggling with what they have had to let go of – foods that are used to eating. When we have ‘managed’ the demons, we find a new strength of achievement. As with all experiences, the new lessons will probably makes us stronger in the long run & will give us the ability to keep repeating the process of ‘letting go,’ with the strength of a balanced Lung energy. This new found strength will give us the self-confidence to face the inevitable changes of life.

Enjoy accepting that life is for ever changing!

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”   Dale Carnegie

Have you had times when you were fearful about something that was coming up and you didn’t quite know what to expect, or how to start the project or take the next step? Most of us have had an experience of this at some time in our life. And have you felt the relief once you actually started doing the thing you were fearing so much? Fear is usually focused on the future. We often think it is the past that is bringing us to our knees, and certainly it can influence all the thoughts and beliefs that are swirling around in our head. But at the end of the day, we can choose not to allow the past to make us fearful of the future. That might sound simple but we are not simple beings. Those beliefs we have had since childhood can pop up even when we’ve done a lot of work on them and think we’ve finished with them.

And this situation in the world that has kept us at home means that we haven’t been able to get out to do the required action, that might calm the fear that has alerted the stress hormones in our body to run wild. I have a friend who is a counsellor in a secondary school and they are run off their feet trying to help these teenagers get back to some sort of balance in their lives. It is so good to know that there is a team working to make sure these kids don’t take their fears into their adult lives. Now is the time to make the changes to those neurological patterns for those young people. Here in New Zealand anyway we are all able to get out and about and take action wherever we can, to act despite the fear.

Enjoy that feeling when you achieve something despite the fear!

 “Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.”  Oprah Winfrey, Talk show host, producer & philanthropist.

This is an interesting one.  I have talked about our beliefs and conditioning.  Our integrity will depend on the perception we have of our life, based on our conditioning & beliefs.  The Oxford Dictionary states that integrity is entirety, soundness, honesty, incorruptibility.  Where do our values show up in this equation?  Have we been brought up to value honesty?  Are we more likely to show integrity with things that we value?  This then comes back to, are we showing integrity just because it can be seen; to be shown to be linked to situations of value!

When I teach my Chakra Dance classes I have a script that talks about the connection to our Soul and the work there is about tapping into that deeper part of us and hearing what it has to say. Integrity in that sense is keeping a connection to that part of us, and when we don’t, Shamanic cultures believe that this is why anxiety, depression and addictions can arise. Basically there is conflict between our inner and outer lives.

How do we feel when we don’t act with integrity…with our value of honesty & incorruptibility?  Are we honest with ourselves?  Do we say one thing but then do something else?  Sometimes this is a hard one to sift out…the truth from our perceptions of how things are. We’ve all probably heard, ‘To thine own self be true’, only we know if we are doing that…what we are feeling in our bodies will tell us, if we tune in.  Life will feel more in alignment if we are being true with both ourselves and with those around us.

Enjoy living in integrity whether it is seen or not!

As I deliver my presentations about Stress, I am continually reminded that the world in general thinks of stress as something that is happening to them from their outside circumstances. Their boss, their family, the juggling of life. And after the circumstances of this year there are more of us than ever feeling the effects!

However stress is actually the response in your body to all sorts of things including your thoughts, beliefs and reactions to both the external and internal stressors. We don’t all respond in the same way to similar incidents. Most times this is initiated when we are children. We develop a way of handling life’s traumas so that we don’t ruffle other’s feathers. This is to make sure that we are loved, that we are secure and that we get our needs met.  This is on the baseline on Maslow’s ‘Hierarchy of Needs.’ We can’t move to the next levels until we feel loved, safe and secure.

A couple of years ago I read, “Childhood Disrupted, How Your Biography Becomes Your Biology and How You Heal,” by Donna Jackson Nakazawa. In her book she talks about the Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) questionnaire and the research that had been done from different specialties, all showing huge correlations between the stress we have been subjected to as a child and the illnesses we present with up to 40 years and beyond later.  Two thirds of the 26,000 in one study said, yes, to at least one of the questions. The 10 questions in the ACE don’t all relate to the major traumas that we would expect. It can be low grade chipping away at our self-esteem. We develop ways of responding that we think work for us as a child and we continue to use them into adulthood. These experiences filter all of life’s experiences from then on.

But whatever the experience then, or the experiences now, our bodies all respond in the same way when we perceive the situation to be ‘stressful.’ We go into the ‘fight, flight, freeze or appease’ mode that everyone talks about. We need the physiological response of stress to just get out of bed each morning. What we don’t need is the 21^st century ‘status stress,’ winding up some functions and shutting others down. If we’re going out to fight a grissly bear we don’t need our immune, reproductive or digestive systems. That is OK if we are going to come back to the cave and settle back to normal. It is not OK if the continuous stress disrupts the normal workings of our body, leading to disease.

What I have also learnt recently is that we all have particular biological drivers that are unique but similar to others. If I choose to do the right exercise but at the wrong time as suits my chronobiology, it won’t be as effective, because my body is stressed. It needs to be doing something else at that time, like eating or resting. Have you been on a diet that works with all your friends but not you? That could be because the food you have chosen suits their biology but stresses yours. Am I striking a chord?

We are complex beings but the paradox is, there can be simple things that make a big difference.

As a 7 year old I remember throwing a fit at a teacher I adored. Showing strong emotion in our house was not approved of, so I felt embarrassed and ashamed. I carried this for 40 years until I had the opportunity to meet this teacher again. I felt compelled to apologise and of course you know what she said, “I don’t remember anything about that, and if I you had acted in that way I would have thought, a normal little 7 year old behaviour. And what’s more I thought you and your friend Barbara were great kids to have in the classroom.” I learned that day, not everyone is brought up with the same beliefs about life. And now that I’m an adult I can change my beliefs. I don’t have to stick to what my parents said, my teachers may have said, the media says! Research and science shows that our brains are ‘plastic,’ they are mouldable, they can change.

What beliefs are driving your stress and behaviour, that you could choose to change today?